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this post will be for jitterbug, who’s just dippin her toes into the investment game, and for anyone else wanting to take an AK-47 into work for one last laugh before hitting Wall Street ( or the street that the KSE is on whatever its called :P).

as a former architecture student, and a former artiste ( said with indignant flair :P), the business world seemed like a foreign land to me. it sounded like it was cold and harsh and devoid of any creativity, inhabited by people obsessed with greed in that endless pursuit of profit so they can one day say ” i’m going to my island for the weekend”.

much to my surprise, i found the business world to be perhaps the most creative environment to be in, perhaps the most stimulating if your mind enjoys solving problems, and the occasional crossword puzzle. granted thats not the orthodox view of the capitalist system but bear with me for a second :P.

i sucked at architecture for one reason: i hated the workload after the concept stage.
also i always figured i’d be able to hire draughtsmen and interns to do all the drudge work πŸ˜›

anyway the concept stage was what i excelled at cos that was the problem solved, and technically everyone should live happily ever after……. read that as: i was a lazy arse πŸ˜›

business is very much an art form. investing is even more so.

in both cases, an idea leads one down a path to determine the feasibility of said idea. you go down the route where everything goes well, and you go down the route where everything fucks up. you plan for as much as possible, back test your ideas, and refer to past precedents if any. if not you look for the closest thing and adapt it to your needs.

and once youve done all your home work, and everything seems right, here comes the moment you have to commit to the concept. whether its the final draft of a script, the final progress report for your division, the last reworking of a song,…. or even scarier,.. that first dab of colour on a canvass.

that still scares me more than a first trade believe it or not, which kinda explains why i havent painted in a while.

so when it comes to mutual funds you have to do the same.
assess the strength of the markets naturally cos that where the funds are parking your money. if the market looks like shit why bother πŸ˜›
check out the fund manager: i know this is unorthodox but insist on it and a good firm should be happy to arrange a meeting for you. if not with the guy then with a junior manager atleast. how they treat customers and clients gives you an indication of the professionalism of the firm.
tell em something like i wanna meet the guy who will be spending my money πŸ˜› youre paying an annual fee after all, so get as much as you can from em so you feel comfortable.

different funds have different approaches. some are more aggressive and would suffer more in a downward spiral, while the less aggressive ones make up for in relative stability that they lack in topline growth. so you have to decide what youre most comfortable with.

and perhaps most importantly, if your maid or bus driver starts asking you about the markets and mutual funds,….. its probably not a good time to go into the markets. in my case a mendoub (a guy that handles things like residency extensions, drivers liscence applications etc), and the lab technician giving me a blood test asked me one month before the big sneeze in february.

pick when you go in and adjust your position as the markets change. a mutual fund actually involves alot of monitoring as well if youre going to make the most out of it.

personally i dont like em at all:P

but thats cos i have the time to pick the stocks that i want to own.

and to be honest its not that hard once you have some fundamental concepts under your hat.

and again the degree to which one utilises the concepts depends on ones character and risk profile.

what i would suggest, if youre gonna start picking stocks, is to read some key books, and no you dont need a college education to understand the best ones :P. dont worry about “not being trained” and all that other crap, cos lets faceit,….. its not brain surgery πŸ˜›

and besides, doctors, lawyers and professors are all known to be abysmal traders πŸ˜›

and remember i used to be an artist, designer, and i do still fiddle with music πŸ˜›

i’m a born again capitalist hahaha!

theres a certain democratic and yet ironically, a slightly communistic element to the stock market. everyones equal and it doesnt matter where youre from, male or female, rich or poor ( provided you have the minimum cash needed of course.)

the chances of you fucking up and losing everything is as good as the next guys lol πŸ˜›

anyway heres what you should read before you do anything:

one up on wall street – peter lynch
buffetology and the new buffetology – mary buffet
intelligent investor – ben graham ( this ones quite fat )

and if you get real interested:

security analysis – ben graham ( even fatter)
financial shenanigans – cant remember πŸ˜›
behavioural finance- two german dudes πŸ˜›

for the newbie is a good place to start, altho i’d take what they have to say with a pinch of salt :P.

wow long post :.

i got the fish bone out of my morals πŸ˜€

lol ok i misspelled molars, but i thought it was funny so what the hell i’ll keep it as is πŸ˜›

hmmm,…. quite a serious freudian slip tho dont you think?



  1. what are u going on about?! πŸ˜›

    all i got was fish bone, something about morals and fools…


  2. lmfao!

    perhaps you should stick it out at the Bank of Krap and Marathon Excretions in that case πŸ˜›

    no youre right i reread the post and i must admit, if i wasnt doing it i probably wouldnt have understood it either:P

    good thing i dont write investment books i suppose πŸ˜›

    its much easier to talk about than to write about πŸ˜›

    a bad investment is the fishbone in the molar of the fool who parted with his money,… thats the moral of the story πŸ˜›

    …. i think.

  3. Awwwww… Thats the coolest and you so rock.. Seems like the light at the end of my investment tunnel :)..

    (the last reworking of a song,…. or even scarier,.. that first dab of colour on a canvas): πŸ™‚ You sound like the full fledged version of what i wanted to be, I’m the dabbling type πŸ™‚

    mendoub: initially thought that jackass who hovered in our office was named mandoop :-S

    Still trying to decipher what msg your subconscious was trying to sneak past you with the I got the fish bone out of my morals πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  4. oh and Thanx vous πŸ™‚

  5. hahaha @ mandoop !

    but its not that much different to calling doctor friends doctor now is it ? πŸ˜›

    another that confused me as a kid,…

    haariss, as in the dude that looks after the building.

    always wondered why his saeedi parents decided to call him Harrison,…… my only conclusion was that they musta liked indiana jones quite a bit.

    lol, its funny now but i was well into why they named him that at the time.

    nevermind the fact that he woulda been 6 yrs old if that were the case 😐

    and youre welcome, I’m trying to figure out how to put my email thingy on the blog so if you or anyone has any questions i might be able to help.
    but until then ask away on here πŸ˜›

  6. πŸ˜€ lwlomao (laffin-whats-left-of-my-ass-off)

    At least you spell it haaris!!! We’d call em Hairass coz they were mostly meano’s

    and yea my hullo to any doc friend is a bug bunny sqawk that goes wats-up-doc!


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