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Monthly Archives: June 2008

the last time safat was down i went looking around for an alternative and found this:

http://bloggersarabiakuwait.blogspot.com/

i’ve settled with google reader so i rarely check safat anymore, but its always nice to see if theres anything new once in a while.

the nice thing about this new aggregator is that its not delayed like 2-3 hours.

the sucky thing is that it only shows the latest post and doesnt archive like safat,… which might be a good thing or a bad thing. i think i’ve only ever checked their archives once or twice.

if you didnt know, now you do.

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Intlxpatr has started a tag that i think is especially poignant at a time when everyone is paying more at the supermarket, mp’s and governments are fighting over money the world over, and just about every stock market in the world is starting to look like an emo teenager who needs to go on prozac,…. or get a good kick up the backside.

so heres the deal:

list five things that make you happy / smile / not act emo that each or all together cost less than KD5.000

which is roughly US$20 or 10 quid or Euros 12.

or 129782578940375847835784378943078 trillion zimbabwean mugabe dollars.

here are my five:

1- the smell of a good strong cup of home brew coffee first thing in the morning ( none of that starbucks crap,… ps even if a starbucks coffee only costs KD 1.500, it doesnt count cos you have to add the “i am a chump and will pay for a lifestyle image” tax of $50 a cup,…. ).

2- the feeling of a rotating cotton bud in your ear…. i’m surprised there isnt a porn fetish for this yet,… or maybe i just havent looked hard enough,.. not that i’ve looked yet. 😐

3- the clipping of nails,…. both toe nails and fingernails,…. but i find toe nails much more satisfying, naturally. ( only my own toenails of course,… i dont want to clip yours or anyone elses!)

4- the first breeze on a freshly shaved head as you walk out the barber shop.

5- that split second, when you jump off the diving board, where youre just hanging, you know right before the plunge.

what?

yes.

of course youre tagged.

you read it, so youre tagged!

why?

cos.

time to google “cotton bud porn”.

on the rare occasions that i actually use my brain for something complex,…

like basic math….

i get hungry.

just one of the many disadvantages to having an unusually large head.

—————————————————————————————

when working, i like to listen to music.

but when working on music, i obviously cant.

which is probably why i have trouble working on my own music for extended periods of time.

this afternoon,…

while i was enjoying an afternoon nap,….

on the couch,….

in front of the tv,…

i was very rudely awakened,….

.

.

.

by the sound of my own snoring.

………………..

or more specifically, your search queries.

the search terms that lead people to my site never fails to amuse me. so this is my way of saying thank you for adding numbers to my stats 😛

1. bacon: – 406 hits

bacon comes from pigs, is really yummy with eggs, and can be fatal if you eat enough of it.

which is pretty easy cos yes it does taste that good!

this bacon is also pretty good too, but i cant attest to the taste of him:

you’ll have to ask his wife about that.

and then there is francis bacon who was quite good with a pack of crayons. he did this:

2. hamilton pool:- 279 hits.

no idea what this was exactly but after googling: – apparently its a nature preserve in texas. heres the link youre probably looking for: hamilton pool.

gorgeous aint it?

3. cacaroches:- 144 hits.

to kill cacaroches you will need:

1 frying pan,

4 bags of 1kg flour,

3 onions,

2 tins of tomatoes and

a pound of apples.

the next time you see a cacaroche,….

.

.

.

THROW ALL THAT SHIT AT IT TILL YOU KILL THE EVIL DEMON SPAWN!!!

mo’ money, mo’ money,

write off our loans!

mo’ money, mo’ money,

write off our loans!

so the mp’s are headed back into parliament to demand yet another KD50 salary + pension increase and the debt write off.

haha, sweet!

thats even more government oil money that wont be wasted on the future generation, and i wont have to wait for the government to allocate the money into investment funds before it hits my pocket.

you see if they did invest it wisely, as they should,…

then it would have gone into investment companies, with professionals managing the future generations’ assetts, and only the profits would have filtered into the investment companies’ earnings before being paid to me as dividends next year.

but now, if approved, the new salary increase will hit the market during the summer. which means that it’ll all be spent by summer. so the money will actually be transfered to the companies, and their earnings will get a nice little boost.

so instead of waiting a whooooole year, the companies whose shares i own will be flush with cash, which will be reflected in their earnings and therefore their share price will float up to heaven on the green wings of the money gods. and all this on top of the dividends that i’ll be getting next year!

god bless the mentally handicapped indeed!

much better than wasting it all on future generations.

and on the debt write off issue,… yet again.

i say ” Write it all off!”

they say that you should never argue with a retard cos people from a distance cant tell who is who. and i agree.

the people of this nation campaigning for this will not wake up one morning and go

” i say old boy, perhaps this isnt the most proper course of action for the future of our nation. perhaps we should just bear the burden of our own financial retardedness?”

you see, as long as people are in debt, justifiable debt or otherwise, they will always be the pawns of those promising to fight for the debt write off. and as long as there are people in debt, then every MP under the sun will support it cos thats where the votes are. for the MP’s its an easy target. is it any wonder that so many “conservatives” who happen to favor the bearded look got into power?

so the skunk shall make a public endorsement:

” i hereby support the motion to write off personal debts that have been built up over time so that everyone can drive a merc and live in a big ass house with 10 servants.”

but,…

and its a big ass “but”, as big a “but” as a big ass butt on a big butted ass.

in order to do it fairly across the board, so that those who havent taken out loans will also be helped, i propose the following crucial “but”:

before being eligible for the loan write off, you must declare yourself financially bankrupt.

because thats exactly what you are.

and with the status of financial bankruptcy you will qualify for aid and a debt write off,…. but,…. with the aid, and with the write off you also have to deal with everything that comes along with your status of being bankrupt.

you will get a new number on your ID card stating that :

a) you are bankrupt, and

b) you are bankrupt to the sum of, for example: class1 – KD5,000, class2 – KD10,000, class3 – KD50,000, etc. ( i know you love your social class hierarchy 😛 )

and with that number on your ID:

you will not be allowed to take out new loans, cos you’ve proved that you cant handle the money.

you will not be allowed to have credit cards, cos you’ve proved that you cant deal with them like an adult.

you will not be allowed to obtain credit of any kind until such a time that you can prove that you are no longer financially bankrupt, and until you can put up collateral other than your nationality and your government job.

but the good thing is that no one will come after you cos you havent paid your loans. you’ll keep everything you stupidly bought, the house, the furniture, the maids, the cars,..

its just that you’ll probably have to drive the same car for the next 10 years.

:O

shock horror!!!

that my friends is the only fair way to resolve this matter. its the only way to make it fair on the hard working people who live a life based on principles and securing the future of their family. and its the only way to make this debt write off a one time deal.

cos in this region, shame and saving face are the only things that matter. its the whole reason these morons are in debt in the first place.

so i say use your own worst traits to better yourselves. get to the heart of how your peoples function and you will understand how to divert all this mis-spent energy into something positive.

so yeah debt write off and salary increase! bring it on!

i’m gonna go count my money now,… 😛