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Category Archives: boobies

one afternoon, while strolling thru a shop with Blue, a bizarre collection of “implements” caught my eye.

now, while i’m pretty sure there are underground dildo salesmen in this country, as mentioned in a previous post, i was pretty surprised to find this collection of “tools” available out in the open.

so ladies / and some gentlemen, if your husband / boyfriend / bit on the side sucks in bed,…

and not in a good way,….

rest assured that your orgasmic salvation is at hand,…

quite literally ๐Ÿ˜›

first on the block, i give you the “Corn on the Cob” dildo:

device1.jpg

it’s made of sturdy thick glass and is elegantly styled to look like a tacky mantle piece ornament so it wont draw your maids attention while shes dusting your bedroom.

following natures design, you’ll find it ribbed for your pleasure, with little corn thingys that will literally tickle your fancy.

and when youre done, just wash it up and theres no need to stash it away as you can even leave it on your dining room table, or in your fruit bowl, and no one will be the wiser. try doing that with a phallus look a like!

what am i bid?

the second implement in our collection will thrill all the tomato lovers in our audience tonight!

device2.jpg

yup! that picture is a bit blurry because this particular tittilator actually wobbles,…. ( and i was in mid wobble when the picture was taken. )

it comes with a sturdy white plastic handle, which extends into the bit that wobbles, and ends in a nice big red heavy weighted tomato!

in the background, on the rack of toys, you will also notice a round studded blue one, which i gotta say looks pretty damn scary and a green hammer looking thing which i’m guessing would be used in conjunction with whips, chains, dripping wax candles and a bound gimp of some sort. ( bring out the gimp! …… umm yes, dating myself with that reference. )

and speaking of S&M, i give you exhibit 3:

device3.jpg

or what i like to call ” the you-better-have-loads-of-lube-erator”.

once again, apologises for the crappy blurry photo,… mid wobble once again i’m afraid.

one simply cannot see them and not wobble them.

theyre very wobble-able!

so who says kuwait needs a sex shop to sell standard commercial sex toys like the rest of the world?!

next week:

Ace Hardware + power tools and how to turn your new “you-better-have-loads-of-lube-erator” into your very own powered dildo.

๐Ÿ˜›

[ incase you didnt get it, there wont really be a “next week”,…. unless someone really wants to know in which case i could probably call an electrical engineer who might be able to help you out ]

ha haaaaa!

made you look ๐Ÿ˜›

since moving to wordpress i’ve been hooked on their “stats” features. its great, and the greatest thing is that its integrated into the damn thing.

so lazy ass me can not spend time learning how to embed those things into the html ๐Ÿ˜€

seeing who has come from where and how is pretty intrigueing, but so far i’ve only gotten the usual suspects and not many random people.

oh and theres also this tag thingy with which you categorise the post,…. mine are there >

i keep getting hits on bacon, pubic hair and idiots.

still nothing as bizarre as expats red mayonnaise jellyfish sex thing or what ever it was, i cant remember exactly.

so i’m gonna add a few and see who i get ๐Ÿ˜›

do leave a comment if its your first time here and you came by way of one of the tags on this.

i want to see just what people click on.

it would suck if this becomes one of those posts no one comments on.

oh and for those looking for the above mentioned sweaty porn torrents, just for yourย troubles i’ll pop up a couple of sites that are pretty good for ya too so it wasnt a wasted click ๐Ÿ˜›