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seriously,… there has to be,…

cos i’m spending a stupid amount of time watching them.

puppycam

surely this be the work of the devil!

where are the beardies when you need them?!?!

someone needs to ban this site!

cos i’m not getting any work done,….

the nerve of some beoble!

the nerve of some beoble!

step 1:

do you have the papers from the 5th of november?

well go get it and no dilly dallying around!

what are you waiting for?

chop chop!

step 2:

now head on over to ebay and auction them off like a bunch of other quite clever people are doing.

1 copy of the Obama edition of just about any newspaper is being sold for anything between US$20 up to US$100. thats an almost 100% return at the least!

go on hurry!

why are you still reading this?!

you can thank me by paying me a finders fee of 25% of your profit for telling you about this loverly opportunity.

you’re welcome.

“a muslim in the white house! whoohoo!”

“an arab is in the white house whoohoo!”

oy vey,…

congratulations obama, you ran a good race and deserved to win.

and thank you for showing me just how surrounded with idiots i am.

its time to get some fresh air.

As america votes, many people around the world are voting too.

its like global american idol, only in this reality show the one that bullshits the best gets a planet earth to play with for 4 years. but atleast on this show, we dont have to put up with hours upon hours of ryan seacrest.

unless youre an E! channel viewer, in which case i hope you enjoyed E!’s 10 best dressed candidates of all time,…

hoover had such pizzazz,… apparently.

here in the middle east, the term “stupid americans” has been used for decades to describe anything worth bitching and / or moaning about; the presidents that are chosen, the wars in the world, the price of tea in china, boys dressing like girls and vice versa, girls acting like boys and vice versa, pollution, traffic pollution, bad taste in music pollution, tv shows that are too sexy, tv shows that are too religous,…. and the list goes on.

basically, if you stubbed your toe on the coffee table it was america’s fault for inventing coffee tables and forcing the rest of us to buy them through their super-secret-mossad-CIA agents at IKEA. ( bah! the swedish, they are just americans who didnt leave to america! ).

this years campaign has been incredibly interesting in that it has managed to capture the attention of even those who would normally not give a shit in this region,…. and before, you couldnt really blame them,…

“who’s running this year?”

“some rich old white guy, and some other older richer white guy.”

“ahh,… i hope the they choose the white guy.”

it was like boxing,… only in negative.

this year the election turned techni-coloured, and techni-genitalled.

and this year the conversations were something like this:

“dude! (or arabic equivalent) they got a black guy running this year!”

“pffft he’ll never get in, the old white guys will not allow it to happen”

fast forward 21 months:

“dude! he’s gonna get in”

“oh i bloody well hope so!”

bloody foreigner: ” so youre supporting obama?”

“of course!”

bloody foreigner: “how comes? i would have thought the republican values would be closer to your traditional values.”

“because he is like us, he will understand our plight being a black in america.”

bloody foreigner: “umm but youre not a black american in america”

“he will understand our struggle better than some rich old white man”

i could have brought up the fact that he was this area’s equivalent to america’s rich old white man but that might have been a tad impolite,….

bloody foreigner: “fair enough, but what about the issues, there is alot that the democrats stand for that is against your traditional values like taxes, afghanistan, gay marriage and abortion” ( this sentence makes me sound alot more coherent than i actually am in person.)

” well the important thing is that he wants change, and that is what the world needs!”

bloody foreigner: “and,…?”

“and nothing, if i were in america i would vote for him because he wants to change the way the world is, mccain will just be another bush, and we dont need another bush”

bloody foreigner: ” and how is he going to bring about this “change” ?”

“he just will, just being a black man in the white house will change everything!”

which i found funny, cos apparently all obama has to do is just be black,…. easy enough, only hes not, being only half black,…

yeah they didnt think it was as amusing as i did, so they just stared at the foreigner who was chuckleing to himself like a madman.

but there you have it.

that is all that matters apparently.

as for the pro-mccain-ers in this region, they basically echo the pro-mccain-ers in america, plus some pretty politically incorrect racial comments, which actually arent considered that politically incorrect over here.

people the world over have overwhelmingly thrown their support behind the candidate that has bullshited the best. the one who said he will bring “change” but not really how, which is actually both of them as mccain is also calling for “change” and not saying how,…. but only after he realized that this marketting tactic did wonders for obama.

buy this can of perfume, it will make you sexually attractive to the opposite sex,… we just hope you believe us and dont ask us to prove it.

so the whole world this time around is standing up and taking sides.

and the whole world, just like america, has been suckered into the rhetoric of one party or another.

perhaps it is fitting that the rest of the world doesnt get to vote, because it seems that even tho the message being regurgitated is specifically designed for the “stupid americans” everyone else in the world is swallowing it and taking sides in equal measures.

but then again, its not all that surprising is it?

after all we eat at the same restaraunts, we wear the same clothes, we drive the same cars, we listen to the same music and we watch the same tv shows.

so apparently the “we” that is the rest of the world, have proven this year to be just as capable at making the same character based decisions as our supposedly dimmer north american friends.

if we, the world, get who we want into the white house, then who do “we” call “stupid” from now on?

.

.

.

this blog endorses Stephen Colbert,…

COLBERT 2012!!!

go on i dare you

go on i dare you

they walked out again today, just as i was picking up my coffee.

i managed to preserve their moronitude for ever and ever on youtube.

serves them right for disturbing my morning cupa joe.

ooh and one guy had a bullhorn,…

so he could yell extra loud,…

appreciate the irony:

a guy who made a decision to trade the market,…

loses money,…

decides to sell and realize that loss,…

and now decides that he is the best person to tell the govt what they should or shouldnt be doing, with his track record of decision making.

oy vey